Boredom and Complacency

I haven't written any article for the past month or so. I just felt lazy to do anything worthwhile. Even as far as my health problem is concerned, i have been complacent about it too. I know I need to take care of myself. I am fully aware of the possible tragic consequences of my complacency. But sometimes I just don't get it. The bottom line is, I think I am still on denial about my health issues. It is not that I deny of its existence. I simply try to live my life as if the illness is not there. If you call this denial- then maybe I am on denial. As a consequence, I really don't pay much attention any more on what kind of food I eat or not eat. In the past month or so, i simply put my dieting on the side. I have been eating all kinds of food-- even food that I know which are not healthy for a diabetic person like me. I still maintained my regular exercise though.(Well, it has not been really regular in the strict sense of the term). But I still try to maintain some form of exercise on occasion, but on a lesser degree. Taking of my medications has become irregular too. I stopped injecting myself with insulin. I haven't checked my blood sugar in a long time. Either I was lazy or i simply didn't care to know about my blood sugar anymore. I just checked in my weight lately and I found out that I have gained another 10 pounds since the last time I was on the weighing scale. Well, this is where I am at for the moment. I don't know what I can do to change my life patterns. Yes, I know I need to do something about this. Do I have to wait till something happens to me again before changing my lifestyle? Boredom, complacency, and laziness...they are getting in control of my life...