To Fly Like A Seagull

Since I was a child, I always loved to dream and try to get hold even the so called impossible and difficult. You may not believe it, but I always dreamt of hiking someday the highest mountain of the world, the famous Mt. Everest in Tibet. I dreamt that someday I would be given the chance to explore the wild rainforest of Peru, and live and get lost in the exuberant vegetation of the Amazon jungle. I would love to go canoeing at St. Croix River, a 150 mile stretch of flowing curves and rapid running water, in the U.S. states of Wisconsin and Minnesota. I would love to go to Alaska and Siberia and ski dive on the highest glaciers, and play among the Siberian bears. If given the chance, I would love to fly into the moon and explore the mystery of the universe and understand the movements of the heavenly bodies. I would love to see what is beyond the sunset, and understand why the sun rises up from the east and sets in the west. Believe me, I always want to fly like a Seagull, dream like Plato, in order to reach the highest heights.

I may sound weird, but I love to face challenges. I love adventure, and I am not scared to face any danger. I am not easily turned down by crises and difficult situations. Why is this so? Maybe it has something to do with the way I was brought up in my family. I am now 47 years old and I have gone through hardships and many difficult situations in life. But, as they say, a crisis can either break you or make you. I guess every crisis that came along into my life, I passed them with flying colors. Since then, I am not afraid to face anything anymore. Now, at this time, I am face to face with a new and difficult challenge. Just a month ago today, I have been diagnosed with this chronic disease called diabetes. Should I feel scared? Should I just stop and surrender myself? Should I just drown myself with loneliness and pain? Or, am I ready to face this challenge? Can I do something about it? What should be my attitude about it? What road should I take? The choice is in my hands.

I said so in the beginning that I am not easily taken up by crises or difficult situations. In any given fight, I don’t easily surrender. As they say, as long you are still breathing, you have hope. From the beginning, I already made my choice. I intend to fight this disease until the end. I know this will be a difficult battle. But I am ready to face this battle whatever it costs. Retreat is never in my game plan. But in order for me to win the battle, I need to be strong and courageous. I know what I am facing. I am not kidding myself that this will be an easy task, nor am I making any presumption that this sickness will just go away on its own. As I already said previously, I have to face the existential truth that this disease has no permanent cure, so far. Therefore, I just have to live with it for the rest of my life.

This existential reality of my life now leads to some basic question: What is life all about? How can one have a fulfilling and meaningful life in this world? Is it enough that we have a family we can call our own, go to work everyday and earn a living, eat three meals a day, do our family and social obligations, and on Sunday we go to mass and then we say we fulfilled our religious obligation? How many of us realize that there are more important things in life than just mere living and existing. Remember that our values, our character, our faith, our love for our family, neighbors, and country, etc. are core values imbedded in the recesses of our souls, and they are more important and significant which we need to attend to. Our life and our material possessions are just lent to us by God. They can be taken away from us at any given moment. Therefore, if we are smart, we should work for something that is lasting. And that is, for the salvation of our souls. Yes, I do not want to sound here very religious. But that is the given truth. As I now face my own mortality, I realize that there are more important things in life that I need to attend to. And I cannot be complacent about it. As we know, when our time comes, it will come suddenly and unexpectedly. Would we be prepared when that time comes?


As I am sitting here inside my car, I see these Seagulls flying around me. They are flying and diving, up and down, trying to pretend that they own the world. They are so care free and unassuming. They can fly anywhere and reach any destination of their desire. As I watch them, I said to myself, I also want to fly like a Seagull. I know that even with this sickness, I would be able to achieve my dreams and reach my destination- with God’s help. It is my desire and hope.